{"id":272,"date":"2026-05-04T05:59:54","date_gmt":"2026-05-04T10:59:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/?p=272"},"modified":"2026-05-04T05:59:56","modified_gmt":"2026-05-04T10:59:56","slug":"let-the-boy-go","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/2026\/05\/04\/let-the-boy-go\/","title":{"rendered":"Let the Boy Go"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<!-- POST TITLE: Let the Boy Go | Week 7 | Statement 7 | Monday -->\n<style>\n@import url('https:\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css2?family=Oswald:wght@400;600;700&family=Lato:ital,wght@0,300;0,400;0,700;1,300;1,400&display=swap');\n.su-wrap{--stone:#4A4A4A;--ash:#F0EDE8;--gold:#C9933A;--shadow:#1C1C1C;font-family:'Lato',sans-serif;color:var(--stone);max-width:700px;margin:0 auto;padding:2rem 1.5rem;line-height:1.8;font-size:1rem}\n.su-tag{font-family:'Oswald',sans-serif;font-size:.65rem;letter-spacing:.25em;text-transform:uppercase;color:var(--gold);margin-bottom:.4rem}\n.su-sub{font-family:'Lato',sans-serif;font-size:.85rem;font-weight:300;color:var(--stone);margin-bottom:2rem;letter-spacing:.03em}\n.su-verse{border-left:3px solid var(--gold);background:#f2ede5;padding:1.25rem 1.5rem;margin:1.75rem 0;font-style:italic;font-size:1.1rem;color:var(--shadow);line-height:1.6}\n.su-verse cite{display:block;font-style:normal;font-family:'Oswald',sans-serif;font-size:.7rem;letter-spacing:.15em;text-transform:uppercase;color:var(--gold);margin-top:.5rem}\n.su-beat{font-family:'Oswald',sans-serif;font-size:.65rem;letter-spacing:.25em;text-transform:uppercase;color:var(--gold);margin:2rem 0 .4rem}\nhr.su-rule{border:none;border-top:1px solid #ddd;margin:1.75rem 0}\n.su-callout{background:var(--shadow);color:var(--ash);padding:1.5rem 1.75rem;margin:2rem 0}\n.su-callout .su-beat{color:var(--gold);margin-top:0}\n.su-callout p{margin:.4rem 0 0;line-height:1.65;font-size:1rem}\n.su-foot{font-size:.72rem;color:#bbb;margin-top:2rem;padding-top:1rem;border-top:1px solid #eee;font-family:'Oswald',sans-serif;letter-spacing:.12em;text-transform:uppercase}\np{margin:0 0 1.1rem}\n<\/style>\n<div class=\"su-wrap\">\n  <p class=\"su-tag\">Seven Statements from the Cross &bull; Week 7 &bull; Monday<\/p>\n  <p class=\"su-sub\">Statement VII &bull; Luke 23:46 &bull; Miles, late 40s, father<\/p>\n\n  <div class=\"su-verse\">\n    &#8220;Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.&#8221;\n    <cite>&mdash; Proverbs 3:5-6 (ESV)<\/cite>\n  <\/div>\n\n  <p class=\"su-beat\">The Setup<\/p>\n  <p>Miles is in his late 40s and his adult son is 27, married for three years, and the marriage has been showing the kind of signs that Miles recognizes with a precision that comes from having been inside a similar season himself. His own marriage went through something hard in his early 30s, a season he does not talk about openly but that shaped him in ways he still carries. He and his wife came through it. It was not easy and it was not fast and it required things from both of them that they did not know they had. He would give anything for his son not to have to learn those things the hard way.<\/p>\n\n  <p>And so for six months he has been trying to help. The help has been genuine and the love behind it has been real. It has also been relentless. Conversations that come back around to the same topics. Advice that was not asked for but was offered anyway. Circumstances that Miles has quietly arranged in the hope of creating the right conditions for the right conversation. His son has not pulled away dramatically. He has just gotten quieter around his father, a little more careful, a little more managed. The distance is not large but Miles can feel it and it is moving in the wrong direction.<\/p>\n\n  <p class=\"su-beat\">The Crossroads Moment<\/p>\n  <p>The particular thing Miles is wrestling with is that he is not wrong about the marriage. He can see what is happening with a clarity his son does not have yet because he has been on that road before. The information he is trying to pass along is real and it is relevant. The problem is not the content of what he is offering. The problem is that he has made himself the delivery mechanism for an outcome that belongs to God, and in doing so he has started to carry a weight that was never assigned to him and has started to apply a pressure that is damaging the very relationship he is trying to protect. He loves his son. That love has quietly become control. And Miles knows it. He has known it for a few weeks. He just does not know how to put it down without feeling like he is abandoning his son to a wreck he can see coming.<\/p>\n\n  <p class=\"su-beat\">What Jesus Did<\/p>\n  <p>Jesus committed his spirit into the Father&#8217;s hands. He did not attempt to manage the outcome of the resurrection from the cross. He did not arrange circumstances or apply pressure or keep his hand in the process beyond the point where it was his to hold. He placed what mattered most into the hands he trusted completely and he released it. Proverbs 3:5-6 says to trust the Lord with all of our heart and to not lean on our own understanding. Miles has been leaning heavily on his own understanding of what his son&#8217;s marriage needs and has been trusting his own ability to deliver it. The understanding may be accurate. The delivery mechanism is wrong. Some things we love are only safe in God&#8217;s hands. Trying to keep them in ours, even with the best intentions, is not protection. It is interference.<\/p>\n\n  <p class=\"su-beat\">The Choice and Outcome<\/p>\n  <p>Miles is on a walk one evening, alone, and he says something out loud that he has needed to say for months. Not to his son. To God. He says: this is not mine to fix. I can see it and I want to fix it and I love him more than I know how to say, but I am putting him and his marriage in your hands right now and I am stepping back. The walk home is quieter than the walk out. Something in his chest that has been tight for six months loosens by degrees. He calls his son the next morning. No agenda. No advice embedded in the conversation. He says: I love you. I am here if you need me. That is the whole call. His son is quiet for a moment and then says: thanks, Dad. Three days later his son calls back and actually talks. Not because Miles said the right thing. Because Miles finally stopped saying things and made room for God to say something instead.<\/p>\n\n  <div class=\"su-callout\">\n    <p class=\"su-beat\">The Lesson<\/p>\n    <p>The flesh believes that love means staying in the process until the outcome is right. The Spirit understands that real love sometimes means placing the person we love into hands far more capable than ours and stepping back. Surrender your life to God and let it go, including the parts of it that walk around with our last name.<\/p>\n  <\/div>\n\n  <p class=\"su-foot\">stumbleup.me &bull; #StumbleUp &bull; #SevenStatements &bull; #OpenHands<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Seven Statements from the Cross &bull; Week 7 &bull; Monday Statement VII &bull; Luke 23:46 &bull; Miles, late 40s, father &#8220;Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":273,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-272","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-burden"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/SU_20260504_BLOG.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/272","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=272"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/272\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":274,"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/272\/revisions\/274"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/273"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=272"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=272"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumbleup.me\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=272"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}